Have you ever lied to yourself? Well, I am super guilty of that. While I could smell or sense when someone else is lying to me, I could not uncover or detect my own lies. I could not understand why I kept attracting people that would lie to me until I looked in the mirror and got to the root of my problem.

In my blog post, “The Art of Unlearning”, I spoke on unlearning one’s belief system, which is the key to overcoming the bad habit of lying to one’s self.  Everything starts with self. Carl Jung said it best: “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” I started becoming aware of when I would subconsciously lie to myself. This thing was in the subconscious, and in order to change it, I had to become aware of it. After my awareness, I would watch myself like a movie. While I am still uncovering myself in this department, my awareness is growing.

The truth is, changing yourself is an illusion. To grow as a person begins with awareness. The more aware you become, the more natural change would come to you. Moreover, the more aware you are, the easier it is to accept who you are.

Some of us are natural liars. We mask our truths because we are trying to fit in or be accepted. I can always tell when someone is masking themselves or not being truthful.

I have lied to myself and others about my marriage. I would tell people it was good, knowing damn well I was suffering. I would post pictures of us on Facebook, pretending to be happy, smh. I was afraid of the truth and hid in the illusions. I was refusing to accept the reality of my marriage because I wanted it to work. “The fake it till you make it” mantra was causing me a lot of pain and suffering. Internally, I was unhappy and afraid of the truth.

I would lie to myself and run from the truth. The lie was a source of comfort to hide behind. But the truth keeps lurking in the shadows. Sometimes I would cry because I know the truth but simply cannot accept it.

I know what it’s like to live a lie and feel trapped within these lies. The lies we tell ourselves keep us from living our best life. The truth is now, not the projected version you want it to be. The truth is unapologetic, raw, can hurt, but in the end, it feels good.

My marriage taught me that no one can’t lie long enough; people will eventually see the truth. I thought I could hide it, make it look good and pretend, but people saw through everything in the end.

However, it is so easy to live a lie than face the truth. But the lies kept killing me on the inside. After my awakening, I could not deny the truth any longer. I no longer wanted to be a slave to my own lies but rather to live my truth and be free.

In my “Live Your Truth” post, I talked about the journey of choosing to live a life of truth. Today I no longer give a damn about how many Facebook friends, likes, or followers I have. I now desire real connections and real conversations. 

I have chosen my truth. I would rather be hated for my truth than to live a lie. Although I understand that the mainstream media entertains lies and denies the truth, I have no desire to be mainstream. I only desire to speak, write and walk boldly in my truth. I want to be remembered for being authentic, truthful, a light, and a spiritual teacher. I would rather be low-key walking in my truth than be popular and fake. Selling your soul is a real thing and I would rather live my truth than being liked for being someone I am not.

How many lies have you told yourself?

I am committed to my spiritual journey of forever evolving mentally, physically, and spiritually. I look forward to hearing from you, talking to you, connecting with you, and staying enlightened with you.

#befree #bealight #loveandlight Denetria Brijel

Email: [email protected]

Pinterest: dedespeaks

Instagram: Denetria Brijel